All posts tagged NBA

It Wasn’t LeBron, It Was Cleveland

By | June 8, 2011 | Basketball, Celebrity Athletes, LeBron James Ego, NBA | Comments Off

Brian Windhorst is one of the best beat writers in the NBA, but today I discovered he’s also a modern day Upton Sinclair.

It’s tough to be a reporter, truth-to-power, taking a stand in the face of adversity and all that.  And sometimes you need to dispel egregious misconceptions.  Sometimes, you need to point out that the emperor has no clothes.  You have to stand in the face of a thousand dissenting voices and yell, “NO!  This shall not stand!”  Let not the ocean of opposition drown you out.  You must defy all those who would silence you.  Thank God we have men such as these.  Thank God for Brian Windhorst.

I am shocked – shocked to find out things aren’t what we’ve been told they are here.  Contrary to the the scuttlebutt on Cleveland, turns out IT SUCKS!  Oh, wait, what?  How can that be? Didn’t I just hear Joakim Noah saying it was his favorite road city?

No?  I feel so deceived.  Every day we’re all bombarded with how great it is here and how shit doesn’t catch on fire and Drew Carey, blah, blah.

But — holy fuck — was I misled.  Now I find out it’s actually a gigantic putrid asshole?  Damn what would I have done without the intrepid Brian Windhorst?  What with all the jokes about how ridiculously great Cleveland is, one is almost forced to believe it the best place on earth.  I distinctly remember that not once did I hear anyone suggest LeBron’s “the decision” was based on the fact that no one would ever want to live in Cleveland by choice.

Now, almost a year later, he springs it on us.  I’m glad he was finally able to muster the courage.  I have to think his job is now on the line. But he’s taken the risk for us.  He’s revealed the truth despite the obvious peril it exposes him to. While I appreciate that, it’s almost too much to take.  Next thing you know he’ll be telling us it’s a BAD idea to put pictures of your cock on twitter.  (No jinx!)

Finally, the whole thing makes a lot more sense.  It was only a year ago Windhorst was saying LeBron “had blood on his hands” for his performance in the playoffs and that 2010 would be a “permanent mark” on his career.  Now we find out LeBron was just so distracted by the declining population in northeast Ohio that he forgot to make baskets!  His concern for our economic well-being was so great he had to shoot foul shots left-handed in order to demonstrate the backwardness and corruption rampant in Cuyahoga County!  It may have APPEARED he was standing idly by as his team fell apart, but in actuality he was busy drawing up ways to reconfigure the tax structure to attract new businesses.  I take back all the bad things I said about you, LeBron.  It’s shameful I was unable to solve this mystery myself when everything was right there in front of my face.

So carry on, Brian Windhorst.  Shine your beacon of truth wherever the dark shadows of deceit would obscure our vision.

Image: Clevescene.com

Dallas Moves On To NBA Finals

By | May 26, 2011 | Celebrity Athletes, LeBron James Ego, NBA, playoffs | 1 Comment

Dirk Nowitzki is pretty good at basketball.  He’s also very tall and that helps sooo much in this game.  In fact, you’ll find that most basketball players are taller than everyone else, a tradition going back to when Bill Russell entered the league and never let anyone else touch the ball again. This moment of clarity for basketball coaches everywhere would open up a lot of opportunities for tallies, and the game would all of the sudden become watched by people.

Who knew? Thank you, tall people, and thank you Dirk for doing some awesome stuff this postseason. 48 points the other night and… highest point scoring total in the fourth quarter in the last 10 NBA postseasons. That makes him King of the Tallies, people.

Of course, others on his team like Jason Kidd, Shawn Marion and Jason Terry do some stuff, too, and Jason Kidd has been around so long his name has become the definition of irony, I think. I’m not sure what the definition is, but if nothing else, it makes me giggle.

The argument I heard the other day is something along the lines of how Dirk stuck with his team and now it’s paying off vs. the “Lebron easy way out super team move” and how Dirk did the right thing.  Except… the Dallas Mavericks haven’t won a title yet.

LeBron took a bad team to the Finals, he just lost. Love him or hate him, he was the Cavs and singlehandedly took them to the end. And now, he seemingly takes over games whenever he wants to and can’t be stopped. As my son said yesterday, his defense is almost as awesome as his offense.  He’s also right now bringing it in the clutch against the best defensive team in the NBA  and shutting down the Bulls’ most effective player in the fourth quarter. In other words, ladies and gentleman, I think LeBron James is starting to blossom now and it ain’t pretty for the rest of the league.

To me, it seems he’s starting to get the feel for when it’s LeBron time and when it’s not. He seems to be learning how to run this team and while, as a team, they are not as well-oiled as Dallas, his enormous talent and play-making on both ends of the court is not something for which you can prepare.

Of course, Miami hasn’t moved past the Bulls, but I like to state my predictions as facts and then when it doesn’t happen the way I said it, I’ll never mention it again.

Now that we understand one another, I’m going to say that it will be the Heat and the Mavs in the 2011 NBA Finals. And then we’re going to hear about the whole “LeBron vs. Dirk vs. staying vs. leaving” discussion for at least 4 games. I’ll want to punch everyone for not shutting up about it, but most of them will be far too large and I’ll just have to sit on my hands. Unless Marv Albert says something. I think I could take Marv even though he’s a biter.

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Sorry LeBron

By | May 13, 2011 | Basketball, NBA, Uncategorized | Comments Off

LeBron James, in a seemingly rare moment of self-reflection, apologized for “the way it happened.”

I couldn’t do it by myself against that team. I apologize for the way it happened, but I knew this opportunity was once in a lifetime.

LeBron was light on the specifics. I venture what LeBron meant to say was he was sorry it wasn’t easy. He’s sorry that he had to work for it. That he needed to get better at mid-range jumpers. That his defense had to improve. That he had to pass to guys who could potentially miss. He’s sorry that he never tried to bring anyone to the team. That he refused to commit to the franchise for more than a
few years at time thereby putting them in perpetual “win now” mode and crippling any chance at long-term stability. He’s sorry the
team gave him everything he ever asked for and, in retrospect, coddled him far too much. He’s sorry he’s immature. He’s only
25 after all.

Most of all, he’s sorry the world wants him to earn it. His birthright may have been an incredible ability to play basketball, but a ring is promised to no man. I think LeBron half-expected David Stern to hand him the Larry O’Brien trophy on draft night. “Oh, need to play some games first?” He’s sorry that even such massive talent, such blinding speed and awesome raw power couldn’t show up, throw down a few dunks and walk away with a championship every year.

Ken Levine / Getty Images

There’s an iconic photo of Michael Jordan hugging his first championship trophy, openly weeping, indubitably reflecting on all the hard work he’d done over his then 7-year career and the preceding decades. He probably thought about the back-breaking work of building a team from nothing to the ultimate winner. The countless hours spent toiling through the playoffs with less than ideal teammates. In the end, there was no doubt he alone was the consummate champion – a singular winner.

So, LeBron is sorry. Well, I’m sorry too. I’m sorry that should LeBron shed his own tears in the coming weeks they won’t mean quite the same thing.

NBA Championship: Anyone’s Game?

By | April 7, 2011 | Basketball, NBA | 1 Comment

Take a little LeBron James, some Kevin Durant, some Derrick Rose, a little Dwight Howard, a touch of Kobe Bryant and you have the awesome NBA Spread that I put on both pieces of bread for my entertainment sandwich. The NBA has never been more interesting, and the game is as exciting as it ever has been.

It’s much of the same in the West, the Spurs and the Lakers dominating. When will it end? When Kobe retires? When Jackson retires? And the Spurs are like the Patriots, a genius coach, a changing supporting cast and an enduring legacy that seemingly will never die. Some might say they are bi-winning.

In the East Derrick Rose is the one now being compared to Michael Jordan (at least for his leadership qualities). The Bulls have won over 50 games and are leading the Eastern Conference with the Heat and the Celtics steaming up their tail.

Probably the most interesting story of the year is when LeBron James signed with the Miami Heat along with Chris Bosh to create a new “Dream Team” within the NBA.  What we’ve seen so far is flashes of brilliance incorporated with monumental squirrel-brainedness and inexplicable happenings like their defeat at the hands of the Cavaliers not long ago. One wonders whether they will be able to remain consistent throughout the playoffs.

With only a handful of games left, most of the playoffs are set and while there are a lot of the same names around, everything is very much up in the air. The Lakers will probably be there in the end. At this stage, it seems like it would almost be weird to not have them there. It’s not a foregone conclusion, but it will be surprising if they’re not fighting for the ring at the end.  Might we see a Bulls/Lakers rematch? I hope so.

The Magic could surprise everyone. Dwight Howard has been on fire this season and poised to assert his role at one of the greatest players in NBA history. There’s a lot going on right now. There are a lot of great stories and stories behind the stories. I have no idea what’s going to happen when the championship run begins, but I do know I’ll be glued to my television set and the results will be nothing what I expected.  That’s one of the reasons I love it, and I simply can’t wait.

Clearly, What Los Angeles Needs is More Basketball

By | April 1, 2011 | Basketball, Fired, Football, Uncategorized | 8 Comments

At least, that’s what the Sacramento Kings think.

Bonds were approved this week, which would allow the Sacramento Kings to move to Orange County, making Southern California home to 3 NBA teams: the Clippers, Lakers and, potentially, the Kings.

Which raises the question, how can a city (yes, I am aware that the OC isn’t LA, but that is semantics, yo) which doesn’t even have its own NFL team support three basketball teams? Phil Jackson, coach of the Lakers, doesn’t think it can.

“What other metropolitan area has three teams in it?” Jackson said rhetorically. “It’s ridiculous to put another franchise in this market. It just doesn’t make sense to do that.”

Indeed it does NOT, Coach Jackson. Especially when one considers the potential implication to the Anaheim Ducks, whose practice and play schedule would be severely impacted by the move.

Even Dennis Rodman thinks this shit is ridiculous. Take heed, OC.

The Lakers and Clippers plan to raise holy hell to keep the Kings out. Which, admittedly would be fun to watch. Updates as things progress.

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