All posts tagged Michael Jordan

Sorry LeBron

By | May 13, 2011 | Basketball, NBA, Uncategorized | Comments Off

LeBron James, in a seemingly rare moment of self-reflection, apologized for “the way it happened.”

I couldn’t do it by myself against that team. I apologize for the way it happened, but I knew this opportunity was once in a lifetime.

LeBron was light on the specifics. I venture what LeBron meant to say was he was sorry it wasn’t easy. He’s sorry that he had to work for it. That he needed to get better at mid-range jumpers. That his defense had to improve. That he had to pass to guys who could potentially miss. He’s sorry that he never tried to bring anyone to the team. That he refused to commit to the franchise for more than a
few years at time thereby putting them in perpetual “win now” mode and crippling any chance at long-term stability. He’s sorry the
team gave him everything he ever asked for and, in retrospect, coddled him far too much. He’s sorry he’s immature. He’s only
25 after all.

Most of all, he’s sorry the world wants him to earn it. His birthright may have been an incredible ability to play basketball, but a ring is promised to no man. I think LeBron half-expected David Stern to hand him the Larry O’Brien trophy on draft night. “Oh, need to play some games first?” He’s sorry that even such massive talent, such blinding speed and awesome raw power couldn’t show up, throw down a few dunks and walk away with a championship every year.

Ken Levine / Getty Images

There’s an iconic photo of Michael Jordan hugging his first championship trophy, openly weeping, indubitably reflecting on all the hard work he’d done over his then 7-year career and the preceding decades. He probably thought about the back-breaking work of building a team from nothing to the ultimate winner. The countless hours spent toiling through the playoffs with less than ideal teammates. In the end, there was no doubt he alone was the consummate champion – a singular winner.

So, LeBron is sorry. Well, I’m sorry too. I’m sorry that should LeBron shed his own tears in the coming weeks they won’t mean quite the same thing.

Kobe Bryant Is A Punk

By | April 20, 2011 | Basketball, NBA, Unsportmanlike Conduct | 5 Comments

I’m tired of his face. I’m tired of his words. 

After Gasol’s poor performance in game 1 against the Hornets, Kobe would call him out and say that Gasol needed to play better. He would do it in a backhanded complimenty way, saying that Gasol is one of the best, etc.  And I would quote Kobe, but I don’t want his words in my post. It will make it feel dirty and yearn for a chemical shower.

So, rather than tell you what he said, I’ll tell you what Gasol said:

“I expect myself to perform, it’s not what anybody else thinks or believes. I know when I play well and when I play bad and my first game was bad. I need to play better. So, I don’t need to focus on the obvious or comments that are not positive. It is what it is. It’s part of the deal.”

I took special note of, ”comments that are not positive.”  As in, “Shut the fuck up, Wonder Boy. I keep quiet when you suck, which happens a good bit. You’re not helping.” And he’s not.

This is the classless remark I would have made if I were Gasol. I would then probably walk into the locker room, open Kobe’s locker and pee inside of it.  I am what is known in most traditional circles as “immature” and like Kobe, I can’t keep my mouth shut. The difference is, mine is set off by gaping assholes who should keep their opinions to themselves (like me).

Unlike me, Gasol,  decided to take the high road and not urinate on Kobe’s possessions. Though I disagree with his course of action, I respect his right to choose.

I’m not saying Kobe is a rapist, but I’m not saying he’s not, either. At the very least, we know he’s cheated and we know he hurls homophobic insults when things aren’t going his way. We know he publicly reprimands his teammates when they have a bad game, which should not be done unless Dennis Rodman is your teammate and you are Michael Jordan. We know that Kobe used to be a punk, and we know that he still pretty much is. It’s a shame, because we need a hero.

I was talking to my son yesterday and, like me, he loved Jordan and when Michael retired, basketball lost something for both of us. And Kobe, despite accomplishment after accomplishment and reasonably being the only man who can currently be compared to Jordan, can’t be rooted for because he’s such a douche nozzle.

Lebron would then come along and show amazing potential, but now he’s a punk, too. He also seems to prefer being a role player to a leader and likely left Cleveland because he was expected to do it himself, which he could do if he wanted to. Instead, he gave up and took what he saw as the path of least resistance to a championship. That’s not Jordan-like, either.

Our desire to see one man rise above all others and accomplish things that no one has is in our very nature. It’s the relentless pursuit of the unattainable that drives our species, and seeing someone push beyond what was once the pinnacle of achievement reminds us of who we are as a race. And in the NBA, we’re still waiting for a new bar to be set. Not only by someone who is great at basketball, but someone who inspires our souls. A hero everyone can get behind. 

Meanwhile, I’m still reminiscing about Jordan schooling Stockton, Malone, Olajuwan, Ewing and others, wondering if days like those will ever return.

 

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Michael Jordan Clears Things Up About LeBron James

By | July 20, 2010 | Basketball, Celebrity Athletes | 5 Comments

I don’t think anyone can argue that LeBron is perhaps the most physically gifted player… maybe ever. He’s massive, he’s fast, he’s graceful… and he’s a big pussy. There. I said it.  LeBron is a puss-wa. I say this with the complete knowledge that one day this giant man may stand before me and question my choice of words while I disappear in his shadow. That is when I will look up, raise myself on my tippy-toes, slightly pucker my lips before looking up at his massive chest and saying, “puuuuuusssssssssy”.

Pierce and Garnett hold back an angry LeBron after a fan says his jersey makes him look fat.

Pierce and Garnett hold back an angry LeBron after a fan says his jersey makes him look fat.

Am I saying I could beat up LeBron James? Nope. I’m just saying I would give it a shot if he wanted a piece.  At 5’10″, 162, I would use my smallness to my advantage. My initial strategy would be to hide somewhere in his clothing, maybe his pocket or in his shoe. From there I would begin a vicious assault on his joints, or maybe even climb into an orifice and take him from the inside out like an angry squirrel in an attic full of wires.

Allow me to clear up the debate: LeBron isn’t fit to carry MJ’s jock strap. If any comparison can be made to MJ among the current players, let’s talk about Kobe Bryant.  Had he not been accused of rape several years ago, he would be doing Hanes commercials and kids across America would be wearing Air Kobes.

Kobe-Bryant

Kobe Bryant was well on his way, and now with 5 championships under his belt and all with entirely different supporting casts (sound familiar?), it begs the question, “Is Kobe the next MJ?”. Let’s break it down:

Leader who elevates his teammates’ game. Check.

Killer jump shot. Check.

Top-notch defender. Check.

Takin’ it to the hole, baby. Check.

Three-pointer. (Kobe better from beyond the arc?)

Want the ball in his hands when game is on the line. Check.

One hand covered with rings. Check.

I’ve always found him to be a little smug, though as he’s aged, Kobe has seemed to humble (despite his continued accomplishments) and has become more MJ-like in just about every way.  My point is, let’s look past LeBron’s enormous potential and pay a little attention to the guy who is actually doing it right before our eyes.  Kobe Bryant may be the best basketball player we’ve ever seen, and for whatever reason, we’d rather not acknowledge it.

But enough about Kobe, let’s talk about his royal highness, King James. In an interview, Michael would clear it all up for us. After a recent celebrity golf tournament in Nevada, he succinctly, in true MJ fashion, wrapped up why LeBron will never be Michael Jordan:

“There’s no way, with hindsight, I would’ve ever called up Larry, called up Magic and said, ‘Hey, look, let’s get together and play on one team. But that’s … things are different. I can’t say that’s a bad thing. It’s an opportunity these kids have today. In all honesty, I was trying to beat those guys.”

I was trying to beat those guys.

There you have it. The best wants to play against the best, not play with the best (unless it was to humiliate third-world countries on a global stage).

1992-dreamteam

The Miami Heat may go on to win a championship. They may win five. But this also wouldn’t be the first time a sports team has assembled incredible talent and failed to bring home a championship. I certainly hope this is one of those cases.

Cleveland is known for its status as pretty much the poorest city in the country. Now, that’s not LeBron’s fault, but he is the only one who has ever been in a position to literally save Cleveland. I’m not being dramatic. A championship sports franchise can make a city, bringing billions to a local economy, thousands and thousands of jobs, and literal happiness for sports fans who’ve been gettting the short end of the stick for… ever.

LeBron was in a position to put Cleveland on the sports map for something other than being historic losers, and literally change the way a whole city was perceived by every sports fan in the country. It’s not LeBron’s fault that all of that was resting on his shoulders, it just was.

“With great talent, comes great responsibility.”

Like I said. It’s not LeBron’s fault a whole city depended on him. I mean, hey, he just came to play basketball and all these problems existed before he got here. So he’s going to take what he needs and move on, leaving those people with all the same problems they had before.

It reminds me of those old westerns. You know, the ones where the hero gunslinger rides into the town that’s been terrorized by bandits and as he’s getting supplies, the people are explaining how this gang comes in every couple of weeks, steals their children and burns their houses down. And then the hero gets all mad and squinty-eyed (Clint Eastwood) and says, “Bummer. Good luck with that. On my way to par-taaaaaay in South Beach.”

Sometimes in life you find yourself in a position where you can positively touch millions of lives, lives that could really use it. And as is usually the case, it might come along with some personal sacrifice. In my mind, these are the kinds of decisions that define who you really are.

For me, LeBron has told me everything I will ever need to know about him. He’s not a hero, just a selfish guy out for his. He has become the shining example of the ugly side of professional sports, and more importantly, the ugly side of people. Sometimes we all need a hero, and LeBron is not it.

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MayoPie likes sports. He has a blog, too.

Lakers Trounce Suns. Kobe Breaks Career Record. Odom Eats Steve Nash’s Legs. (I Made Up The Last One.)

By | May 18, 2010 | Basketball | 4 Comments

In Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals last night, the Lakers came off a week long rest and showed about as much rust as a new Lambourghini. Though Lamar Odom didn’t actually eat Steve Nash’s legs, he grabbed nineteen rebounds in the 128-107 victory over the Suns. That’s a one and a nine put together to make one very large number. I watched a little of the game and I saw other people standing around the basket. They appeared to be pretty tall and they had feet. I assume since they’re playing in the NBA they can even jump and probably fully understand the concept of the rebound, but I haven’t watched basketball much since MJ left and they might have changed some things.

sunsl-lakers-game-1

And that brings me to Kobe Bryant, who scored 40 points last night and broke a career record with 6 straight playoff games scoring 30 points or more. Kobe Bryant is a bonafide stud, and one of the best to ever play the game.

We’re always looking for the next Michael Jordan and maybe we’re all getting sick of the comparison, but it’s in our DNA to want to define the best ever. Many thought it would be LeBron, and maybe it will be, but Kobe Bryant is purely awesome and has proven time and time again that like Mike, you want the ball in his hands when the game is on the line. More importantly, so does Kobe.

I think back to what made Michael Jordan great. A perfect fall away jumper for one. Could drive to the hoop with the best of them. Great defender. Kobe? Check. Check. Check.  And he can do all of it just as well.

Michael Jordan could win with any supporting cast. Kobe? Check. And in my opinion, this is the X factor. Michael Jordan wasn’t only a great player, he inspired his teammates to greatness. Good players, for sure, but not great players.  But when they were on the floor with Michael, they all took their games to the next level, and it was his leadership that did it. Does Kobe have this X factor? I think he does. Does LeBron?

There’s no doubt there’s never been a more physically gifted player than LeBron, but does he have the heart? Does he inspire greatness when the chips are down?  What does he bring other than himself?  Because that’s what made Michael Jordan great. His ability to elevate everyone else’s game, in addition to his own.

Am I saying that Kobe is the greatest player ever? Not necessarily, but I think the subject is very much open to debate.

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LeBron James Pink Puffy Hearts Michael Jordan

By | November 13, 2009 | Basketball | 4 Comments

I’m not even sure how to approach this.

You know how LeBron James decided that he is going to give up his #23 jersey and he thinks everyone else should too?

Picture 1

As in Michael Jordan is so awesome no one else should ever be able to wear his number. As in universal optional retirement of the number 23 all of the sudden.

Here is my take on it.

  • LeBron looks up into the stands.
  • LeBron is star struck.
  • In a moment of freaking out LeBron goes temporarily insane and makes crazy blanket statements on TV.

Where the hell did this come from?

Here is the strangest part. I’m not even sure he is wrong. Michael Jordan was totally a badass. It would be kind of cool to retire his number across the board.

But then you run into two problems:

1) What about Wilt Chamberlain?

WILT_CHAMBERLAIN

And Larry Bird?

larry-bird

And Bill Russell?

bill-russell

And Karem Abdul Jabar?

Airplane_kareem_abdul_jabar

There are others too, Magic Johnson, Jerry West, Julius Irving…

2) The NBA could run out of numbers.

What do you think? Is this a reasonable request or has LeBron gone crazy?

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