Contributors | Draft Day Suit

Contributors

Commissioner

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Sarah, aka Goon Squad Sarah, lives in the Washington D.C. suburbs and spends a lot of time obsessing about the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the Washington Capitals, fantasy football, and explaining to her seven year old twins why we don’t root for the Redskins in our house. She attended (and graduated from and YES it is an accredited school, Gabe) The University of Central Florida. She was a senior when Daunte Culpepper was a freshman. Shut the hell up – you are old, too. Sarah is also a sucker for the Orlando Magic and she is still trying to choose between the Tampa Bay Rays and the Washington Nationals.

If you can’t get enough of Sarah here you can also find her writing at Sarah and the Goon Squad, That’s right. You heard meBlogHer, or a myriad of other sites depending on the day. She also sits on the advisory board of Women Talk Sports.

 

Coach

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ClumberKim

ClumberKim is a sports geek. The die was cast early, by age 8, when Kim told anyone who would listen that she wanted to be the Boston Bruins statistician when she grew up. She could recite the roster by number, position, or hometown.

Her sports interests are diverse, ranging from figure skating to football. She loves to watch golf, read books about golf, and trash talk golf, but she has never swung a club. The Fantasia Gardens course at Disney World doesn’t count. Her participation in sports was limited to tennis in high school, rugby in college (where she excelled in the third half), and pitching endlessly to her baseball-loving son until he started hitting balls that could break windows. She has recently returned to tennis and also shows dogs, which is a sport, too. Really. REALLY!

She has never forgiven her family for not taking her to game 7 of the 1975 World Series. To add insult to injury, she was in college with a bunch of Met fans from Brooklyn in 1986. Her first whiff of weed was in the bleachers at Fenway Park. She did not inhale.

Kim lives in Pittsburgh, the City of Champions, where she is a tour guide at PNC Park. She also writes at ClumberKim and Eat Your Tea.

 

Team Roster

Flutter

Christine is a hockey whore. She proclaims her love of ice skating men, maybe even Brian Boitano, at every opportunity. Christine is also known as flutter likes to harass people on Facebook and twitter.

 

 

 

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Gidge

I am a transplanted Hoosier who resides in the Atlanta metro area. I’m a die hard Colts fan and as far as I’m concerned you aren’t a fan unless you suffered through Jeff George as a quarterback. I’ll give you a pass if you weren’t born yet, but mostly if you weren’t standing beside the highway cheering the Mayflower trucks into town on the night we stole that team, well then you aren’t a fan. Additionally I think that wearing a pink jersey is a brilliant way to pwn an opposing team’s player. If you pick your fantasy team based on uniform color or a players “Hot Butt” – well I’m sorry you may not sit with me during games.
I only speak dead languages fluently and I like to wear things that make no sense.

 

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Headless Mom aka Kendra

Kendra, or Headless Mom as she’s known around the interwebs, has been a sports fan for as long as she can remember and comes by it honestly. Her grandmother was never far from her tv or radio with the play-by-play on, and her mother seems to prefer sports talk radio to cooking dinner. Kendra loves football the most, but certainly has an opinion about (almost) all sports out there. She loved tennis until her (fake) husband, Boris Becker, retired. Getting cable so she could watch ESPN was the only condition that she had before moving in with her current (and only real) husband, Headless Dad. He is currently a Golf Channel addict. Their three Headless children are currently being brainwashed by their mother to hail all things gridiron. She also writes about her life at The Adventures of the Headless Family.

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Kristabella

Kristin, who also answers to Kristabella or “Hey! Drunk Girl!”, is a reformed band geek with an amazing ability to drink most people under the table. She honed her drinking skills as a student at Arizona State and is proud to be one of the few people who not only graduated from ASU, but graduated in four years. After working in the sports information office at ASU, which included a Rose Bowl appearance and a point-shaving scandal, Kristin landed a job with the San Francisco 49ers and spent six years living out a life-long fantasy of working in professional sports and getting sexually harassed every day. She now lives in Chicago and yells at athletes through the TV set. They can totally hear her.

You can read her other inane ramblings at her personal blog, Kristabella: Full of Snark Since 1977, where she talks about her exciting life as a spinster with two cats and a fascination for Bacon.

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Mayopie

Clay is sure the Mayans have it all wrong and that Bruce Lee will actually resurrect in 2012, bringing peace via the impending threat of an almighty tiger claw from the heavens. It’s all in “The New Bible” which Clay is currently writing with a group of imaginary friends he calls his “Aposse.” Clay is in advertising where he convinces people to buy things. Watch this: The New Bible. If you don’t buy it, you’ll probably die.

 

TJ

TJ

TJ aka Studio816 is a Kansas City native that believes that the Royals WILL win World Series before he dies. In fact, not only will they win the World Series, they will do it the same year the Chiefs win a second Super Bowl trophy. So, look out world. 2067 is going to be one wild year for Kansas City sports fans. In his free time, TJ is a father of two, a photographer, a writing fool, and a full time Big 12 apologist. You can catch his other musings at MamaPopHow To Eat, and StudioEightOneSix. Do you still need more? Well, he abuses Twitter (@studio816) like it owes him money.

 

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Tricia

Tricia was raised as a Dodgers fan and somehow married into a Yankee loving household. Sacrilege she knows, her dad doesn’t understand it either. After moving to Seattle she decided to raise her two boys as Mariners fans. When in Rome and all that jazz. During college basketball season she bleeds red and blue for the Arizona Wildcats and hates Duke with a passion.

Tricia is pretty good at most sports, but she’s not great at all of them. She has her dad to thank for her love of sports. Her dad encouraged sports play and lived by the mantra, “If you can touch it, you can catch it.” She ended up with a lot of bloody noses. He also said that almost every problem could be solved with a “stick with a hook” and that’s pretty much true, so these are the things she tries to live by. Bloody nose or no.

 

Uncle Crappy

Uncle Crappy may live in Pittsburgh, but he grew up in Columbus. He attended his first Ohio State football game in 1973 and the experience pretty much ruined him for life; he’s now a season ticket holder and has spent years torturing himself with endless cycles of angst and ecstasy that come with being a serious college football fan. He’s willing to torture others as well, with post after post about the beauty of tailback iso plays run under slate-gray November skies.

Being an Ohio guy has been, uh, helpful in other facets of his sports fandom as well. He loves the Cleveland Indians and he’ll even publicly admit to being a Cleveland Browns fan, which means he spends a lot of time trying to convince the Stillers fans who surround him that the NFL actually existed prior to the appearance of Chuck Knoll and Terry Bradshaw in Pittsburgh.

He hasn’t resisted all the charms of his home city, though — he’s loved the Penguins for decades and he even likes the Pirates, in an “aww, isn’t that cute” kind of way.

Uncle Crappy writes about Ohio State football and tailgating at killernutstailgating.com and everything else at unclecrappy.com. He also writes about tech stuff, transportation, craft beer and other things at a Pittsburgh-area newspaper.

 

Mighty-Hunter

Mighty Hunter’s first sports love is football (of the pads and oblong spheroid variety), a love which he unashamedly admits was first germinated while he played trumpet in his high school and college marching bands. Since then his love of sport has grown and branched off in interesting and confusing ways, such that if he were to list the teams he roots for, you might think he was a little unhinged. Examples include, but are not limited to, Seattle Seahawks, Kansas City Chiefs, and Jacksonville Jaguars (NFL); New Jersey Devils and Vancouver Canucks (NHL); Penn State Nittany Lions (NCAA football); Duke Blue Devils (NCAA basketball); Seattle Sounders FC (MLS); Celtic FC (Scottish Premier League); and FC Bayern München (Deutsche Bundesliga). Baseball and professional basketball do not make the list; he believes that baseball is three hours wasted (until the playoffs finally roll around), while he might like professional basketball more if there was less showboating, LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, and LA Lakers in general involved.
Note: If there’s a sports team in Los Angeles, he automatically hates it. He’s just wired that way.

 

Dude of the House

Jay is known as The Dude of the House, partially because he is a Dude and he lives in a house. This Akron* native has lived in Southern California for more than a dozen years but is still a die-hard Indians, Browns, Cavs and Buckeyes fan. He’s warmed up to the Dodgers after many years but still thinks that watching pitchers hit is ridiculous. He doesn’t follow LA’s pro football team.
When not hanging out here, he can be found at Dudeofthehouse.blogspot.com  or wasting way too much time on Facebook  and still trying to figure out the purpose of Twitter. Go stop by and say hello. Bring deep-dish pizza, if you can.
(*=Jay loathes Akron’s most famous native/athlete who recently took his talents elsewhere, even though his parents live around the corner from him.)

 

Carla Swank

A life-long fan of all things Black and Gold, Carla has joined the ranks of the displaced Pittsburgher, now residing in Nashville, Tenn.

Carla is a two-time graduate of Robert Morris University (otherwise known as “that school that ALMOST beat Villanova in the NCAA Tournament in 2010”) just outside Pittsburgh, where she built upon her love of sports through the student television station where she served as a senior sports producer.

She went on to dabble in sports media, including a stop at a suburban Pittsburgh newspaper, several freelance gigs, and most recently, as a writer, editor and team site producer for a large online media company where she covered high school and college football.

She appreciates hockey fans who understand that not all board checks are worth cheering, summer evenings at PNC Park (because it’s tough to admit being a Pirates fan) and midweek MAC football.

Carla proudly wears her Steelers and Penguins gear in Music City USA … and she’s trying really, really hard to adopt the Predators, even if Nashville is still working on that whole “cheering for a check” thing. They’ll get it someday. Maybe.

 

Adam Liberman

Adam suffers from his own version of Stockholm Syndrome. After being kidnapped at birth into a hard-scrambled life of a Cleveland sports fan, he became attracted to sports to the point it became his career. Just like a kidnapping victim, he believes the abuse he’s suffered will one day result in love in the form of a championship.

He graduated from Ohio University with a degree in journalism and took his talents back to Akron where he ran communications for the Akron Racers of the Women’s Pro Softball League. He left Northeast Ohio spent 10 seasons in the Atlanta Braves media relations office from 2000-09. Since then, he has worked for NBA Digital, wrote for a Cartoon Network NBA kids’ show and the parent company of the U.S. Army All-American Bowl.

He is back in the Northeast Ohio area, unable to fight the attraction and trying not to be distracted by all of the enjoyable useless information and facts floating in his head. He’s a follower of just about all sports, which is probably why he’s single.

 

Jill

Jill grew up in West Virginia [insert redneck joke here] surrounded by refrains of Let’s Go Mountaineers! and Eat Sh*t Pitt! The daughter of a transplanted New Englander, she was raised as a Red Sox/Patriots/Bruins/Celtics fan. She left the mountains of her childhood home to attend THE Ohio State University (Hey, Uncle Crappy, O-H!) only to heed the siren call back to WVU for law school [insert lawyer joke here], where she met her husband, a native Pittsburgher. Jill has lived in Pittsburgh for the past 12 years and has discovered that you really can’t live in Pittsburgh without loving professional sports. Except basketball – professional basketball does not exist for Pittsburghers. And you could have gone the last 19 years without loving baseball. Really, you don’t have to love sports to live in Pittsburgh; you just need to profess your undying devotion to the Steelers and Penguins and, yes, even the Pirates, which she has done wholeheartedly (sorry, Dad!). Jill and her husband have been successfully indoctrinating their two children into the world of Pittsburgh sports, which means that they also will know next-to-nothing about basketball.

 

Kemp

Kemp has always enjoyed sports, especially soccer, baseball, hockey and football, and is an avid fan of the defending World Series Champion St. Louis Cardinals.
Kemp, along with his wife and twin, 10-year old daughters, live in the Chicago area, but Kemp remains a St. Louis loyalist and cheers for the Cardinals, Rams and Blues. While he will, on occasion, cheer for the Chicago Bears, he will never, and he means NEVER, cheer for the Chicago Cubs.
Kemp is a graduate of Eastern Illinois University, but does not claim loyalty to Tony Romo because he plays for the Cowboys – and has two graduate degrees because he’s a glutton for punishment.
When he isn’t trying to prevent one of his twin daughters from cheering for the Cubs, Kemp is a professor at a local college and works in the sports department for the local newspaper.

 

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Roger

Roger is some guy who sometimes writes about the sports as it pertains to him and him alone.

You can also find Roger at Marginally Clever.

 

 

Canadian Dad

From his humble beginnings as a national level fastball player and elite hockey talent, Chris now spends his days as a slightly overweight, working class father, who excels at fantasy sports, complaining about the referees and post game naps.

Chris is from Canada, which makes him a huge hockey fan by default. Growing up in a Toronto Maple Leafs household, he quickly learned to love the Montreal Canadiens and has never looked back. He never met a sport he didn’t like and has a favourite in all of them. Gooooo Pro Recco Water Polo team!! Aside from hockey, Chris is a huge fan of the Dolphins, Blue Jays, Tiger Woods (yeah, I said it), Georges St. Pierre & the Notre Dame Fighting Irish football program. And yes, that last one is because of the movie, Rudy, wanna fight about it?

Outside of here, you can catch him writing on his blog, Canadian Dad, and also on Twitter @CanadianDadBlog.

 

Ms BossyNoPants

Ms. BossyNoPants has two loves: Tom Brady and Craft Beer. She enjoys both of those for 17 weeks every Fall and it is a glorious time for her. Raised in sunny San Diego, she grew up a Chargers fan and a Packers fan because her Dad is from Wisconsin. After a move to BFE Ohio in 1992, she decided to switch allegiances and become a Patriots fan. Why? Well, the uniforms were pretty colors and she was 12. In college she became a Yankees fan out of spite and in her late 20’s she became an LSU fan out of love. After moving to Pittsburgh in 2010, she’s become a die-hard Pirates fan and a reluctant Penguins fan. Can someone teach her about hockey, please? She will never, ever, ever under any circumstances, root for the Steelers. Ever. Don’t ask her about basketball or soccer or any other sports, she could care less.

Logo Genius

Aaron

The Kaiser

Logo designer and all around badass.