Ivan Calderon, the 105lb former boxing bad-ass apparently likes blow. I said, likes blow, not likes to blow. Get your mind out of the gutter. Read more…
I installed the Couch25K app on my iPhone, and set the goal of running a 10-mile race in the spring, on a date I have long since forgotten because I totally bailed on the whole thing. Besides the utter panic that I would not be able to complete a ten-mile race, even one that people swore was “mostly downhill”, I hurt my foot, as I am forever hurting my feet, and I didn’t feel that I would be in the kind of condition required to do it.
First of all, I am a sucker for a good player arrest. Second of all, I like Sebasian Janikowski’s arrests because besides the DUI, he was once charged with bribery and felony possession of GHB. These aren’t your run of the mill NFL crimes. This is no concealed weapons charge. He almost got deported for the GHB thing.
Now he is accused of false imprisonment, an accusation that puts the bribery charge to shame!
He (allegedly) falsely imprisoned a woman. Who does that? That is a messed up crime, even for a kicker. Even for an Oakland Raider!
It is like he read a pamphlet on weird things to do wrong. Next Janikowski will be tying cows to parking meters or hunting whales without a permit.
The Raiders CEO says it is old news. I say to Amy Trask that doesn’t make it any less funny.
Mr. Janikowski has also been arrested for bar fights and underage possession of alcohol.
Okay, so what was the first thing that popped in my mind this morning as I took one crazy long morning pee?
Kim Kardashian.
Yep. Don’t judge. I know she was on your mind too, you pervs.
Apparently, Mrs. Kim Kardashian-Ray J-Bush-Austin-Humphries has a wee little connection to the Tennessee Titans. No! You don’t say? Kim Kardashian has something to do with any sort of professional sports? Huh. I thought she fancied JUST the players themselves!
Anyway, you might need to buckle up for this. It’s basically some Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon shit. And not even in a cool Footloose kind of way.
As you may have heard, Kim Kardashian has a sex tape. Yes. Shocking. What you may not have heard? There is a “mystery meat buyer” for said video tape. Sources (and by “sources” I mean GOOGLE) say that this gentleman has such a loving and downright creepy crush on Mrs. Kardashian, he is willing to pay Vivid Entertainment some astronomical amount of greenbacks just to take the tape off the market. A tape, mind you, that everyone and their mother can and has seen for free. Well, except for me. (Hi, mom!)
Now, here comes the connection to the Tennessee Titans. Get ready. Are you ready? I said GET READY. Who is the connection? Well, it’s NOT Kevin Bacon. Sorry to shit in your Cheerios. The connection is Adam Dread. You see, Adam is the lawyer who represents the Mystery Man. But that’s not all. Adam Dread is also a rapper. A rapper of the rarest of forms. A rapper, who raps about the one and only Tennessee Titans. Yes, you read that correctly. The man raps. He raps about the Titans. Yes. Hold up your panties, ladies.
Oh, my. Just oh my. I don’t even have words. Actually, I do have words. And those words? Aw, hell. I can’t remember. I am way too horny after listening to that entire song. Mount up!
Former Washington Wizard Javaris Crittenton is wanted on charges that he killed Jullian Jones, 23, in Atlanta, on August 19.
Reports indicate that Crittenton fired shots from a sport-utility vehicle, perhaps intended to hit two men walking with Jones, as retaliation for an April robbery. Jones was struck in the leg, and died in surgery.
There is a warrant for Crittenton’s arrest, but he has not turned himself in. He was reportedly in “the L.A. area” over the weekend, and the FBI is assisting with the case.
While still a Wizard, Crittenton was involved in a firearm dispute with teammate Gilbert Arenas. Crittenton went to court on the related misdemeanor gun charge, and both were suspended for the rest of the season. Crittenton tried to start over with the Charlotte Bobcats, but they released him last October after two weeks, with no room for another point guard.
“I really wanna say sumthing but I wont becuz theirs a dead women involved…”
Good call, Gilbert.
Following his issues with the Wizards, Crittenton seemed in the right spot to turn things around. Plagued by ankle injuries, he landed with the Dakota Wizards in the NBA Development League. Last October, he said:
Use wisdom in everything and just don’t get caught up in foolishness and nonsense and crazy people around you. It was a bad decision on both ends and we’re trying to move forward with our careers and our lives.
Shooting to injure or kill never makes any sense, and even less when a guy with talent and opportunity chooses actions like this. Whatever the reasons may be, none of them are good. If Javaris Crittenton is responsible for the death of this woman, it’s a shame that he chose the opposite of wisdom. He really didn’t need to do that.
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