All posts in Talking Trash

Did Justin Bieber Just Trash Talk Tom Brady

Listen here little boy, you may have over a million hits on You Tube, but I’m pretty sure Tom Brady could take you.

I mean, the man is 6′ 4″, 225 and he gets hit by guys like Dwight Freeney for a living.

Sure, he has your same douchebag haircut, and yes, you had it first but he is

Tom-Brady-Has-Justin-Bieber-Hair-at-NBA-Finals

married to Gisele Bundchen and you

gisele-bundchen_hot

are almost old enough to hit puberty.

I cannot believe I am over here defending Tom Brady! Now I am extra mad at you Bieber!

Whatever, make fun of Brady all you want. Just understand  that these gentlemen

New England Patriots Offensive Line

are paid to protect Mr. Brady.

When people say “pick on someone your own size” they also mean you, Bieber, you little punk.

Also, mind your elders and get off of my lawn.

* * *

Sarah can’t help but wonder what is wrong with these kids today.

Patriot Hair Smackdown: Moss vs. Brady

Oh dear God, this is just so stupid, I don’t even know where to go, honestly.

In the weeks prior to Randy Moss’s ousting from the Patriots, he and Tom Brady apparently had words, some of which involved barbs about Moss’s beard and Brady’s hair. No, seriously, behold, for according to CBS analyst Charley Casserly, this happened:

“One of Brady’s problems with Moss was his behavior as a Patriot,” said Casserly. “One of the things overheard was Brady telling Moss, ‘You’ve got to cut your beard.’ And Moss counters, ‘You’ve got to get your hair cut. You look like a girl.’”

tom-bradys-bieber-haircut

I just … well, seriously? On the one hand, that probably happened, because both accusations are totally true. On the other, as a Boston resident and Pats observer, I’m having a hard time believing that this was a tremendous factor in the whole mess. Boston is notoriously cheap, and is known to be rather miserly when it comes to how they compensate their team members. Brady, of course, is a notable exception, but beyond that, there have been a legion of great players left in the dust for reasons that don’t make sense to anyone but Bill Belichick and MAYYYBE Robert Kraft, but that usually come down to a simple cost/benefit analysis, with the focus on cost.

And oh, look. the Boston Globe already rounded them up for us. And they also told us that this whole thing was in the works last season.

Moss

Don’t get me wrong — I’ll take the controversy where I can get it, particularly if Brady and/or his stupid Bieber hair is involved. But for Pats watchers, this is hardly surprising — in fact, it’s vintage Belichick, and Belichick doesn’t make moves based on who gets along with whom, who fought about hair, and who has the cleaner shave.

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Jonna is a Bostonian who hates football, loves baseball and basketball, and recently had all her dreams come true when Shaq came to the Celtics.

From the Obvious File: NY Yankees Are Arrogant Pricks

Or maybe it’s just Bloomberg. Either way, it’s distasteful to say the least:

Bloomberg already planning Yankees’ victory parade.

Oh, what victory parade, you ask? The one after they win the world series, which is not even scheduled to begin (YES, BEGIN) until Oct. 27. The one that the Yankees are not even confirmed to be IN, given that they haven’t even begun playing the ALCS series. WHICH IS NOT THE WORLD SERIES.

It’s … well, it’s kind of amazing, is what it is, but it’s not really surprising. I understand  that I’m predisposed to dislike the boys in stripes, given my irrevocable status as a member of Red Sox Nation, but errgh, they act like this ALL THE TIME. ALL THE TIME. It’s infuriating, and it’s what makes them so easy to despise, because COME ON.

At least Derek Jeter has some sense, as always:

“You try to win every game you play, but it’s no cause for celebration,” said Derek Jeter, who delivered an RBI single in the seventh. “It’s not the best two out of three. We still haven’t done anything yet.”

(Is now the time to admit that despite wishing most of the Yankees would die in a fire that I have a soft spot for Derek Jeter? And, uh, Andy Pettitte? I am a sports fan after all, and Jeter is a true ball player and Pettitte … well, he’s the anti-Clemens, obviously.)

Jeter

(Smirking probably because he’s dating Lyla Garrity, not because he’s a smug prick. Well, at least not in public.)

{Photo credit: Getty Images}


Jonna is a Bostonian who hates football, loves baseball and basketball, and recently had all her dreams come true when Shaq came to the Celtics.

My Last Word on Michael Vick (I Swear.) (Probably.)

(My friend Jonna wrote this piece about rooting for Michael Vick and my comment got so long it was embarrassing. So here we go.)

Michael Vick is unquestionably one of the most talented quarterbacks in the National Football League.  He might be the best. I’m bad at gauging that kind of thing.

Anyway.

Michael Vick also, unfortunately, arranged, condoned and participated in not only the forced violent fighting of pit bulls that often led to the death of these animals, but he also signed off on the nauseating strangling and electrocution of others who maybe didn’t make the cut or got too messed up in fights to go on.

The disgusting fruits of Michael Vick’s labors haunt me worse than eleventy billion Sarah McLachlan pet rescue videos, y’all, and I can’t even watch those all the way through. I don’t give a damn about Michael Vick’s incarceration, redemption, team spirit, contribution to the National Football League or prowess as a quarterback.

I.

Don’t.

Care.

Michael Vick got caught carrying on with some outrageous behavior that caused the suffering and death of living beings, dogs who get a bad rap in large part due to jerks like him and his friends. He was convicted of this disgusting dog ring nonsense. He served some time in prison. He got out, and super shortly thereafter got snapped up by a team who was willing to deal with his baggage.

michael-vick-eagles

So, he gets out of prison. He gets to make more than a million dollars. He gets to do what he loves. He gets the adulation of a city that wants a Super Bowl more than it cares or stops to analyze the reason why the potential catalyst is there. He even gets awards for teamwork, first year out.

Oh, and he will tell you time and time again how much he’s suffered, yes he will:

I’ve overcome a lot, more than probably one single individual can handle or bear. You ask certain people to walk through my shoes, they probably couldn’t do. Probably 95 percent of the people in this world because nobody had to endure what I’ve been through, situations I’ve been put in, situations I put myself in and decisions I have made, whether they have been good or bad.

Last Sunday, after the Eagles’ stupid ass loss to the Washington Redskins, a Facebook friend went off about how people should LEAVE Mike Vick alone, and he’d DONE his time, and BLAH and BLAH and BLAH and everyone shut up.

It irritated me, and the only thing I’d said was a random comment on my cousin’s Facebook — in response to something she said — about how what I heard when he got hurt was the sound of a hundred pit bulls lauging their asses off.

Yes, I knew he got injured in the game against the home team around here. No, I wasn’t especially sad that he was hurt. But that was that. I didn’t take to my Facebook or Twitter account to tell anyone else how to feel or what to say about Michael Vick. Because guess why?

I feel how I feel about him, and I move on. I don’t care how you feel about Michael Vick, or you or you or you. I’m neither going to “leave him alone” nor boycott the Eagles because they hired him. I listen to my co-worker talk about the Eagles and I don’t roll my eyes at him or ask him how he can bear to still support his lifelong home team.

Because it’s none of my business. And I don’t want him spouting anything off at me about how I need to let my feelings about this guy go, because how I feel about him is none of his business either.

I fail to see what kind of problems face Michael Vick. Sure, he went to jail. I’m sure that was upsetting. A lot of athletes go to jail for various infractions large and small. But my feelings lie with my belief that not only did he do what he did, since he got out he has been more or less an apologist for animal abuse. The way people talk and write about it, it’s just something you have to go to jail for awhile for doing, and sure, your operation is shut down and that’s awesome for the dogs who won’t be strangled and electrocuted on your watch. But people who condemned him, who dare to say anything negative or dare whisper “think of the PUPPIES” are painted as  unforgiving PETA-freaks who don’t understand that he has done his time.

His time that he earned.

He came out of jail to the tune of millions of dollars, back to a job and a public that, by and large, will not see him as a convict first.

So I think he’s going to be fine whether I root for him or not. And yes, I’ll cop to some minor satisfaction during reports today of how he wouldn’t be playing this week and probably next although he desperately wants to go back to Atlanta and face his former team. It’s just that I’m saving my cheers for people who to my knowledge would never have been capable of doing the stuff he did in the first place. I believe in redemption to a point, but not just because someone tells me that jail and a spanking new seven- figure salary helped a quarterback to heal himself. How anyone else feels about it is her business.

LeBron James Proves Discrimination Against Pricks Everywhere

LeBron James stunned CNN and the world on Monday when he revealed that he felt racism played a part in the backlash against his summer of free agency.

While charges of racism are common (and sadly often justified), the truly shocking assertation came later in the interview when LeBron stated that while he may appear to be African-American, he’s actually a Prick.

“LeBron is what he is and what he is – is a Prick,”  LeBron said while defying the assembled group of reporters to diagram his sentence.

“What’s obvious to me is that people don’t like pricks.  There’s definitely a stigma against my people.”

lebron-james-miami-heat

Asked whether abandoning his hometown fans for the joy of playing Barbies with Dwyane y-before-a Wade and Chris Bosh on a daily basis might have something to do with the backlash against him, Lebron was defiant.

“I don’t think that has anything to do with it.  It’s racism.  And as a proud Prick, I will stand tall and defend myself and Pricks everywhere.”

LeBron is well-versed in the history of Prick discrimination and talked at length about the struggles faced by Pricks everywhere.

“It’s not easy being a Prick.  Lots of people don’t like Pricks.  I met Martina Navratilova once – wouldn’t even shake my hand.”

“Look around you.  Who do people hate?  LeBron James, Roger Clemens, Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods, Jose Canseco, Ben Roethlisberger.  What’s common between them?  We’re all Pricks!  It’s clearly racism.”

LeBron didn’t think changing his attitude or the treatment of other people would affect fans’ perception of him.

“I can’t stop being a Prick anymore than I could change the color of my skin.”

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