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October, Wales, Golf . . . Who’s In?

Remember the British Open?  It’s usually played in the midst of summer, July – competitors normally look like they’re about to head out for the Iditarod?  Well, this year they’re playing another tournament in the UK, but later in the year.  It’s the Ryder Cup and I hope everyone brought their mittens.

October Golf - Feel the Heat!

October Golf - Feel the Heat!

I am only half joking.  I live in Cleveland and the weather here is no day at the beach, even when you’re spending the day at the beach.  But whenever I see golf in England I have to take a minute to appreciate how completely miserable it looks.  40 degrees, driving rain and gale-force winds?  Where are my sticks?

Golf was not meant for October.  They invented the game, you would think they know this by now.

One sport meant for October is co-ed (double) touch football.  Wave of Mutilation gears up for a 10 am game tomorrow morning.  Yes 10 am.  Now, 10 years ago, this was a dicey proposition for my team.  We were all in our young to mid-twenties, we were out getting drunk the night before and maybe someone would puke on the sideline (and maybe that happened last year, who’s to say?).  But now, we are old and we have kids.  I was up til 12:30 last night and was probably the only one to miss curfew.  This might seem like a downer, but it often turns into an advantage when our less teetotaling opponents show up groggy to the field.

As life changes you have different problems to solve out on the field like how do we run a three-deep zone while keeping all the kids off the field?  And, we might have to leave the game if Lincoln’s nap doesn’t last through the half.  And the lessons are different as well.  I promise to be understanding when my boy drops a wide open two-point conversion.  But the ball hit my hat and then I couldn’t see with the hat and the clouds and sun in my eyes!

Despite the adversity (and the weather), we’ll happily be out there tomorrow.  Then maybe we’ll get a quick round of golf in – parkas and all.

Twitter at the Ryder Cup: Will They or Won’t They?

On Sunday it was reported that both the European and US Ryder Cup teams had banned the use of the social networking site, Twitter, for the duration of the tournament.

U.S. Captain Corey Pavin said the team as a whole has decided not to tweet this week, because it can be distracting and takes focus away from the Cup, matches and team camaraderie.

“But first thing a week from today, I’m sure tweeting will be all over the place,” Pavin said.

(Dude obviously doesn’t get Twitter. “Tweeting will be all over the place”? Amateur.)

NEWPORT, WALES - SEPTEMBER 28:  Rickie  Fowler of the USA walks across a green during a practice round prior to  the 2010 Ryder Cup at the Celtic Manor Resort on September 28, 2010 in  Newport, Wales.

Gratuitous shot of cutie pie Rickie Fowler since he’s probably the cutest of the bunch, said in a non-pervy, mom-cute kinda way. Check out those eyes!

Combined, Corey Pavin, Rickie Fowler, Stewart Cink, Zach Johnson, Hunter Mahan, and Bubba Watson have over 1.3 million followers. And that is only a portion of the US team. On the European side between Colin Montgomerie, Ian Poulter, Graeme McDowell, Rory McIlroy and Francesco Molinari there are more than one million followers. Those are some powerful numbers in the Twitterverse.

Other professional sports that have banned Twitter use include the NHL, NFL, NBA, and the MLB, most putting a time limit before and after game time, restricting all organization employees. The ban for the Ryder Cup teams just seemed to follow suit.

It doesn’t end there, though.

On Tuesday the ban was lifted by Montgomerie, or modified to allow personal tweets.

“Tweeting has not been banned,” he said. He also who claims never to have used Twitter, (the account linked above is for his foundation.) “Whatever they do [in the posts], whatever they are, respect is shown for what is said within the team room. That’s what I have banned. They can do whatever they have to do elsewhere regarding their thoughts.”

HUH? Let me interpret for you:

“Don’t tweet about the Ryder Cup specifically but feel free to tell whomever is listening that you just took a crap.”

So. Will they or won’t they? So far today I’ve seen a few tweets about mundane stuff, practice rounds, losing cash to their practice partners, etc. No evidence of anyone taking a crap. Damn. That’s what I turn to Twitter for. I guess they’re all taking the ban seriously, so if you’re a golf fan and like to follow your favorite player on Twitter for the inside scoop, you’ll just have to wait until the tournament is over, but by then all the news will be old.

Kendra would love to watch the Ryder Cup but it starts at 2 am. Who gets up for that shit?

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Weekly Roundup: The Primarily Pittsburgh Edition

In this inaugural edition of the Draft Day Suit weekly roundup of news you may have missed, I’m sticking close to home. There’s a lot going on in Pittsburgh right now. Sue me. And then tell me what’s going on in your fair city so I’ll have more to write about next week.

1. The Pittsburgh Penguins opened the pre-season on Wednesday by crushing the Red Wings 5-1 in the first game held at the new Consol Energy Center. Then everyone held their breath when Sidney Crosby sat out the third period with a sore hip flexor, thought to be a minor issue. The Penguins and Capitals also announced they would be participating in an HBO reality series called 24/7 Penguins/Capitals:  Road to the Winter Classic. [Note to self: Call Comcast and see about re-instating HBO. I want to see exactly how Malkin goes from cool to dork in a matter of days and the good folks at HBO are just the ones to show me.]

2. The Pirates swept the Diamondbacks and took two from the Cardinals for their first 5 game win streak in over 13 months. If they sweep the Astros they will finish the season above .500 at home. Heh. Like that’s gonna happen. You know it’s bad when I get retweeted by ThePirateParrot.

3. The New York Times reported a long lost reel of tape containing the greatest home run in Pirates history, Bill Mazeroski’s 9th inning home run in game 7 of the 1960 World Series to beat the New York Yankees, was found in Bing Crosby’s wine cellar, where conditions preserved the only known recording of the series in pristine condition. Crosby was a former owner of the Pirates. The game will be televised by MLB Network in December. My family will be watching.

4. Have you noticed baseball games get longer in September. Why? 40-man rosters mean more available pitchers and that means more pitching changes. It’s merciless. Let it be done already. Now that the Red Sox are out of the playoff picture, NFL and NCAA football and pre-season hockey are a lot more interesting. Not that I’m biased or anything. Spring training gets underway in just five short months!

5. One last baseball note. The Chicago Cubs’ rookie Tyler Colvin had his chest punctured when a teammate’s bat splintered. He spent three days in the hospital with a chest tube to prevent a lung collapse. Owie. This rekindled the controversy over ash vs maple bats. The bat that impaled Colvin was maple, which is prone to splintering. Let’s be careful out there.

6. Moving on to football, I agree with Killer Nuts Tailgating. This was the hit of the week.

7. In the NFL, Jets’ running back Braylon Edwards was arrested for DUI. Yawn. Ordinarily not something I would notice, but this year Edwards rides the pine on my fantasy team in the Draft Day Suit league. The league where I beat the league-leader in week 2 and still dropped from second to third place. Dammit. But back to Edwards. The Jets are handing down a stiff punishment. Edwards doesn’t get to start on Sunday. Boo hoo. Edwards, Cromartie, Holmes…who’s next for the Jets? Quick! Call the Bengals.

8. In some good-guy NFL news, Steelers’ safety Troy Polamalu launched his website this week, Troy43.com. It’s a site nearly as beautiful as he is. Excuse me while I go look at the pictures and wipe the drool from my chin.

9. Wife-carrying, which is totally a sport, was in the news this week. A couple in Maine is training for the North American championship, where couples will vie for a title, as well as five times the winning wife’s weight in cash and her weight in beer. That’s not even the strangest part. If this team wins they are going to auction off the beer.

10. And finally, on the eve of the Ryder Cup, Jim Furyk is still trying to live down last month’s cell phone alarm malfunction that cost him a chance to contend for the Barclays championship. Let’s hope he brings an adapter that lets him plug in at Celtic Manor in Wales. The one that failed him in New Jersey isn’t going to work there either.

Dream On: Book Review Edition

Paula Creamer

photo by John Mummert/USGA

The 2010 US Women’s Open Championship was contested this past weekend at Oakmont Country Club, near Pittsburgh, PA. Site of the 2007 men’s open and host of more USGA and PGA championships than any other in the US, the course is an absolute beast. No poor shot goes unpunished and the greens are more like glass than grass. Around a 15 on the stimpmeter, for those of you scoring at home.

Angel Cabrera won the men’s open with a score of 5 over par three years ago. One caddie predicted one of the women would shoot 100. It isn’t surprising then to find only one golfer, winner Paula Creamer, ended up under par for 72 holes. She is the only golfer to muster three sub-par rounds. Only one other golfer, Brittany Lang, managed two sub-par rounds. I witnessed one player on Sunday throw her putter after finishing the 9th hole, complete with a few words not exactly suitable for a family sport. Like I said, a beast.church pew bunker at Oakmont #15

But maybe your dream isn’t to win a major. Maybe it’s just to shoot a round at par, probably on a course a bit more suitable to mortals than Oakmont. Maybe you decide to devote a year to this task and write a book about it.

That is exactly what John Richardson of Ireland set out to do. Then end result is Dream On:  One Hack Golfer’s Challenge to Break Par in a Year.

He’s a regular guy, with a wife, a daughter, and a full-time job that has nothing to do with golf. He also writes like a regular guy, with a conversational style that’s not unlike a lot of bloggers. The book is very approachable, thought it would have benefitted from a bit more editing. (I thought I would scream if I saw the phrase “hard graft” one more time.) It chronicles the entire year of ups and downs for the 24-handicapper who is striving to just once shoot par.

Richardson feels guilty, so very guilty, about the time spent on the golf course instead of at home with his family. This particular horse is beaten up a bit for my taste, but he’s incredibly sincere at the same time. Not for a moment did I doubt him, though I did find myself wishing for running commentary or at least an epilogue by his wife. I could imagine an audio book with little parenthetical comments from her, or perhaps little mutterings under the breath.

dream_onThe geek in me loved how he was sucked in by every book, video, and gadget he found (and bought, many on eBay or late night tv), searching for another saved stroke. Then I discovered he’s selling what he learned for a mere $19 a month. He will even send you a crisp 10 pound note if you don’t shave 33 strokes off your golf game too.

But none of that takes away from the book. It’s a fun, easy summer read, and certainly inspirational. Dream on, indeed. And come play Oakmont, Mr. Richardson. I’ll hook you up.

[The publisher graciously provided this book to me. The words are my own and I received no other compensation besides the book.]

ClumberKim has been obsessed with golf for more than 25 years. Someday she might even swing a club.

Tiger Chokes Again

Old news alert:  Tiger Woods chokes again.

tiger-woods

With Graeme McDowell’s U.S. Open win on Sunday, another nail was hammered into Tiger’s coffin.  Evidently, he wants to be sure his fate is sealed tight.

It is clear that he is not the player he once was.  His indiscretions have dealt him a mental blow and he looks more like a battered boxer hanging on the ropes than the best golfer in the world.   I guess that’s the hand that karma deals you when you’re a whore.

There is no doubt that if Tiger had kept his junk in his trunk, he’d be in a better position right now.  Despite the fans who still adore him, he can’t deny the fact that he is a broken man whose golf game will be forever changed because some of those fans adored him a little too much.  Okay, a lot too much.

I wish I could say that there is part of me that feels sorry for the guy, but there isn’t.  He is a disappointment to his sport and he is a disgrace to his gender.

I used to love watching Tiger play.  I used to know how fortunate I was to be born at the right time so I could see the best player to ever hold a club.

Now, I just want to hit him with one.

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