The day the Giants beat the 49ers in overtime, I was on a plane from Orlando to my hometown in Albany, NY. It was actually my fourth flight of the day and this is where I note that though I was glad that a roundtrip flight to Salt Lake City, Utah only cost $20 I could have gotten to Europe faster.

I made my flight plans in July precisely around the time that the Giants should have been arriving in Albany for summer training camp but were kept away by contract negations and a lock out. But I digress. As the plane hit the 10,000 feet mark and that tell-tale ding went off in the cabin, I watched as passengers to the left, front and back of me hopped on the in-flight wifi. It’s such a first world problem to complain about how slow the Internet was while IN THE AIR but whatever. There we all were hovered over iPads and iPhones painfully watching each down. Some were able to catch the play-by-play on super amazing headphones – I dunno, technology or something – while I squinted and peaked over the shoulders of the men in front of me to make sure they were seeing what I was seeing.

As the plane started to make its final descent and flight attendants went through the cabin to make sure seat backs and tray tables were in their full and upright position, roughly 20 of us remained “watching” the game. Damn the man and the FAA we were flying in blue and red gear and we were going to watch this game right into the end of overtime.

I remain confused by the new overtime rules. Like, physics confused but I knew that when Lawrence Tynes kicked that 31 yard field goal and – I imagined – that ball sailing beautifully that we had it. At 20 to 17 the Giants were going to the Super Bowl. Of course there could be no outcry because we were supposed to be gazing out the windows and waiting for our ears to pop but I tapped the shoulder of the gentleman in front of me and we gave each other a high five.

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There are people who hate the Giants. Actually there are people who hate all things New York just as I have a difficult time stomaching the Patriots, Celtics and those awful Red Sox. My dislike isn’t because of the way I was raised but because I’ve learned to embrace the rivalry and the game. My father is one of those who hate the Giants. In fact he once told me that he hated Archie Manning and would hate the mother if she played football, too. It’s an Ole Miss thing not just because of the talent or as he would say, “Lack thereof”.

I, on the other hand, have thought about marrying a Manning brother and since 2005 have spent many Sundays arranging my schedule around what time the Giants would be playing. If you were to find me at the end of the season I kind of sit around wondering what to do with myself come 1, 4: 30 and 8PM.

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When Eli was first drafted to the NFL there was the infamous trade between the Giants and the Chargers. Eli didn’t want to go to San Diego and so he made a fuss and ended up with New York. Since then he’s been called a whiner and a crybaby for his decision. He then took over for the legendary Kurt Warner in 2005 as the starting QB and they have never looked back. When people criticize Eli for not wanting to go to the Chargers and for being immature I shrug and wonder what they expected of a 22 year old? I can understand just graduating from college and not having something work out for you and being bummed. Of course Eli did what he did on a far more public scale but show me one early 20-something who is thrilled with their life right after college and I’ll show you a person who is most likely lying.

Over the last seven years what thrills me most about this Giants team is Eli’s leadership and watching him mature. Thinking of it now I realize it’s because we are roughly the same age (he’s a year younger) but that first job is tough and it takes a lot of crap to make the job your own and to grow into what you do. Two Super Bowl appearances don’t just happen. It requires having a team that works well together and gels. With Eli Manning at the helm this team has done just that. So hate him if you’d like. Hate the Giants. Hate their Super Bowl appearances or that they have ruined perfect seasons but don’t hate what they’ve accomplished over the last several years. I love the Giants not just because I’m a New Yorker but because watching them is like magic and I, for one, cannot wait for this Sunday.

Nope. The Bucs made a five year deal with Greg Schiano.

Who?

Greg Sciano.

Who the hell is Greg Sciano?

Well, I’m glad you asked.

Greg Sciano was the head coach of the Rutgers Scarlet Knights for the last ten years. Before that, he was the defensive coordinator for the University of Miami. Before that, he was an assistant coach for the Bears and Penn State. Before that he was a graduate assistant at Penn State and Rutgers. Before that he had a high school football coaching job. Before that he was a linebacker at Bucknell. Before that he was probably in high school.

And now he is the head coach for my beloved Tampa Bay Buccaneers and we will just pretend I didn’t cringe every time I typed Penn State in that last sentence.

Basically, Ray Rice was all “Woo hoo! Way to go coach!” and I was all “If this gives the Bucs a shot at Ray Rice I am cool with you guys hiring his mom as head coach.” And everybody else was all “Who?”

Ray Rice is a free agent and a total badass and he played for Sciano at Rutgers.

Yes, I know he wants to stay with the Ravens, but a girl can dream, right?

I personally wish Mr. Sciano the best of luck in Tampa and think he should go eat at Mise en Place when he gets there because that place is awesome. I also hope he can bring home a winning season next year, but as a Bucs fan I don’t expect much. It would be a step up if we only lost nine in a row.

Oh I have some thoughts on this.

First of all, statistically you have issues that are bigger than your rookie quarterback.  If you think a recently returned from Injured Reserve Manning is going to be down with signing on with a team whose offensive line has more holes in it than the Magic Bullet theory, you should probably consider that.  Your noneffective line allowed Sanchez to get sacked to such an extent you’d think he was Jeff George (I haven’t pwnd George in a while).  It’s simply naive to think you can plug in a super star and make your team work.

I mean, last time I checked, Brett Favre was a pretty good quarterback. How was that Super Bowl he took you to? Oh, right, that didn’t work out. He got hurt, as I recall. Torn bicep in his shoulder?

So from a very practical standpoint, Manning can’t go anywhere without a line of monsters to protect him. He’s got history with Indianapolis and those boys don’t let Peyton take a hit too often, so even though they aren’t the biggest guys around I’d suspect he would want to know what he’s getting in protection from the line.

Second of all, GOD NO. What the HELL. I have about 1000 other expletives that could go in here, but I promised Sarah to limit the eff bombs.

If Manning went to the Jets then there would be two Mannings playing for New York teams and that’d be like matter and anti-matter meeting up, end times for sure. It’s some sort of anathema to me that I can’t fathom as a fan. Not just as a Colts fan ( I get it, they might trade him) but as a MANNING fan. I mean CRAP can’t he go play someplace GOOD? The crappy JETS? For real? Dear GOD just send him to Tampa Bay. At least I love the Bucs and Tampa’s a fun town (right Sarah?).

I think I can’t continue as I will start swearing and now I sort of want a beer. But my take on this, from a purely editorial and over emotional point of view is this.

NO.

*image source Rant Sports NFL ~ Brian Spurlock US Presswire*

Let me begin by saying that I’m not a deeply religious man, but I do believe Jesus was a great man who stood for the underdog. And if one day he does come back to judge us, Tim Tebow is probably going with him. I, on the other hand, will have some splainin’ to do.

In my defense, I’m working on it. So back off. Don’t judge me. That’s the big man’s first rule. Or at least one of them. Keep that in mind when you look at this picture. I had to.

But like many things (or at least four things), this is not about me. This is about Tim Tebow and the guy who had a popular song once, replaced “St. Elmo’s” with “Tim Tebow” and has resurrected his own career, much like Jesus plans to do, but probably with a different song.

Be warned that the song is not good. There’s a lot of guitar slapping and awkward dancing.

Personally, I love to see a man of faith who walks it likes he talks it. I also believe that belief, in and of itself, is extremely powerful. Faith is at the core of courage and determination, and Tim Tebow has so much of it that it spills over into his team.

In every sport, and even life, confidence breeds success and Tim Tebow’s faith gives him confidence. Does Jesus actually reward his faith by crushing the dreams of opposing teams? Doesn’t seem too Jesusy to me.

However, if he is to make a comeback and wanting to deliver us one final message before sorting us all out, why not use America’s passion as one way to deliver that message?

There’s no question that Tim Tebow has brought the religious debate to the forefront, and if nothing else, that’s a great thing. People are questioning whether or not his faith his related to his success, and I absolutely believe it is. Not necessarily because a magic and holy hand is touching the game, but Tebow’s pure belief that he can overcome any obstacle because of his faith.

Then again, the Lord does work in mysterious ways, and nothing is more mysterious than a guy who completes 45% of his passes and still wins in the NFL.

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San Diego Chargers’ offensive lineman Kris Dielman, who happens to have two little kids, was quoted saying he would put going for a win ahead of his own health. Later in the article he says that he would get cleared by doctors but since the Chargers didn’t make the playoffs it’s a moot point.

This is in stark contrast to Ryan Clark, free safety of the Pittsburgh Steelers’, who will sit out today’s playoff game against the Broncos due to sickle cell trait and the issues associated with playing at altitude. Clark had problems in 2007, when playing in Denver ended up costing him his spleen, gallbladder, and about 30 pounds. He hasn’t played a game in Denver since.

Clark is quoted as saying he would play today but head coach Mike Tomlin, father of three, said no.

 Here is Clark, talking about Tomlin’s decision to bench him:

“When a man tells you his reasoning for not letting you play is because if that was his son, he wouldn’t want him out there, it shows you he cares about you more than just as a football player, that you’re not just an asset to a football team,” Clark told reporters. “He understands you have a family and people that depend on you.”

As a mom, I hope my kids’ athletic coaches always put their health ahead of a win. As a fan, I assume coaches like that don’t exist at the professional level. I was glad to discover that assumption was wrong, especially for my hometown team.

ClumberKim lives in Pittsburgh. 

Oh don’t tell me you haven’t noticed how awful it’s been, and not just the ‘lesser’ non-BCS bowls.

This season has been the poster child for a playoff system in college football, and if I wasn’t convinced before, I am now.

If there aren’t at least 6 Defensive Coordinators looking for new jobs I’ll be surprised.

No team should be at a bowl praying for a win to GET TO A .500 SEASON. The sponsors should be ashamed of themselves for letting it get to this. Athletic directors should be turning down bowl invitations. Honestly, I’d rather turn one down than have this kind of humiliation.

Why you ask? Let’s look at the facts:

•  7 of the teams have a losing record, with one at an even 6-6. That isn’t even counting the 24 teams that are one game over .500. That means that over 50% of the teams asked to be in bowl games had average seasons. When did bowl games start being about mediocrity?
• While 7 games (by my count, I could be wrong,) have been decided by 3 points or less, a whopping 11 games have had a point gap over over 10 points. (Wait for it. I’m getting to the Orange Bowl.)
• I love a high scoring game, to a point. 6 games have had a combined score of 75 points or above, with 2, YES 2 GAMES OF OVER 100 COMBINED POINTS.  Thus why there is going to be a glut of Defensive Coordinators on the market next week.
• Can we talk about Boise State? This is a team that has won it’s conference (or shared the top spot,) 10 of the last 12 years. Did you read that? In that time, they have only been in 2 BCS bowls. 2. They have a 8-4 record in bowl games in the last 12 years. Again, did you read that? 12 bowl games in 12 years. The BCS should be ashamed of themselves for overlooking this team again and again and again. Obviously a top tier team, and they get sent to the Las Vegas Bowl 2 years in a row? 2 years they have been asked to play teams like Utah and Arizona State.Not exactly the teams you think of when you think powerhouse football. Since 2008 Boise state has a 50-3 record.

Playoffs should look like the basketball Final Four brackets. Each of the major conferences would send their champions, with a spot or 2 built in for poll picks or independent teams, if necessary. It would be over in about 3-4 weeks, with a built in extra week before the title game. All of the existing sponsors would get a game to sponsor (or be coupled with another sponsor,) so the money and advertising would still be there and the schools that actually deserve the exposure would make the money for an actual winning season.

Now really? How hard is that? Because honestly, if this BS continues, there will be no more BCS for me.

After scoring a touchdown against the Jets on Sunday, Stevie Johnson chose to celebrate with an award-winning performance (Mayo Pie award for most awesome touchdown dance ever) mimicking Plaxico Burress trying to remove a gun from his pocket and shooting himself in the leg. Some would call this move classless and sophomoric, and these are not fun people.

Let’s put this in perspective: A rich football player walks into a bar carrying a gun in his pocket. Not only is it illegal to have the gun, but especially to have it concealed. Since he’s a celebrity football player, he felt he needed the gun for protection. Because as we know, giant super athletes with posses who can crush most men aren’t safe in swanky nightclubs.

While fumbling in his pockets, Burress shot himself in the leg with the very thing intended to prevent him from getting shot. In my opinion, that is wonderful irony that can only be accurately protrayed in a tasteful touchdown celebration performed by one of his peers.

When Burress was asked about the fine, he simply said about Johnson, “He can pay it.” And he can. Easily and happily. So what’s the point? What’s the lesson? I don’t know, but it seems a meaningless punishment that won’t disuade the behavior. It’s like a $10,000 practical joke, and considering the additional publicity and personal satisfaction he garnered, well worth the money.

What am I saying? I don’t know. That shit was funny and I don’t feel bad for Plaxico Burress or get all weepy that his delicate sensibilities were offended. It’s not like he was mugged or victimized. He was breaking the law, carrying a gun in an unsafe, moronic way, and likely consuming alcohol. This is a catastrophe waiting to happen, and it did. He lived, was punished a little harshly (in my opinion) and the story lives on through interpretive dance. I love it.

Was what Stevie Johnson did classy? No. I’ve long stopped expecting class from the NFL. An example of that would be at least five guys cheating on every play. Is that classy? Is illegally videotaping opposing teams’ signals classy? Is grabbing a man by his facemask and trying to remove his head classy? Stomping on a man when he’s on the ground? Sending unsolicited pictures of your unimpressive penis to team employees? Classy? Whatever. If you want class, watch golf. Oh… wait. Not golf. Ummm…. curling? Or that one where they ski and shoot stuff. They look classy.

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As a Sun Devil alumnus, I’m less than pleased.

Arizona State reached out to Pitt and asked permission to interview Graham. Pitt denied the request. With good reason, seeing as Graham just finished his first season coaching the Panthers. And Graham wasn’t even Pitt’s initial first choice last offseason, but came in three weeks after Pitt had hired former Miami of Ohio coach Mike Haywood, who was then arrested on domestic violence charges and promptly fired by Pitt.

Since Pitt denied the request, Graham took matters into his own hands. He decided to resign and gave the terms of his contract with Pitt a big middle finger. This after he brought players into his office and personally told them he wasn’t going anywhere.

Wow. Some class act we got coming to Tempe, huh?

Not that there was much left to choose from. The Sun Devils were supposedly in talks with Houston coach Ken Sumlin, but he dropped out of the picture when then Texas A&M job became available. ASU was all ready to announce SMU head man June Jones as the next head coach, but then dropped it at the last minute, supposedly amid backlash from alumni and boosters. (Which, DUH! Why would you replace Dennis Erickson with another Dennis Erickson??)

The rest of the head coaching openings in the Pac-12 have seemed to have gone in the right direction – Rich Rodriguez to Arizona, Jim Mora to UCLA and Mike Leach to Washington State. And ASU went with Todd Graham. For some reason the “one of these things is not like the other” tune from Sesame Street is now in my head. Which one of those names just doesn’t belong?

Last year ASU unveiled a new logo and a new (stupid) tagline – Fear the Fork. Now I’m afraid with this hiring, it’s Fear the Wins. Fear Being Elite. Maybe it should be Embrace the Mediocrity.

I’m pretty sure Pittsburgh Tribune-Review columnist Dejan Kovacevic summed it up best with one tweet:

Such is life as a Sun Devil fan. SIGH.

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Kristabella will always bleed maroon and gold and hopes that Todd Graham proves her wrong.

Simple.

I was drunk.

Yep. That’s all I got for you on that one, folks. Also? This was not, in any way, shape, or form, a shock to anyone in the Kansas City area. So, I did what any proud Kansas Citian would do when one of our head coaches get fired. I drank. A lot. And not because I was sad or mad or had any emotion whatsoever about this firing. No, no. That’s not the case at all. I drank because I was bored. And alcohol is tasty when combined with Mexican food.

Anyway, my point? Nobody in this towns cares about Todd Haley anymore. At the beginning of this season, he was pretty much a lame duck coach. He created controversy with his unorthodox “training camp” during the shortened off season that most likely directly resulted in the season-ending injuries of not only our starting linebacker Brandon Siler, but our starting tight end Tony Moeaki, our starting Pro Bowl safety Eric Berry, our stud speedster Pro Bowl starting running back Jamaal Charles, and then eventually our underachieving Pro Bowl “quarterback” Matt (mesodreamy) Cassel.

Yes, I realize that pretty much ANY coach wouldn’t be able to win very many games given the multitude of injuries to that many star players. And I am going to go out on a limb here and say that it wasn’t necessarily the lack of wins that got Haley canned. You know what it was? His piss poor attitude. When you berate your offensive coordinator on national television (his third in as many years), you have a problem with the way you handle yourself. Now, if you are willing to do that to your fellow coaches, just what in the hell was he doing to the players?

His bad attitude turned into inconsistency on the field. In a sense, his players were through with his Jekyll and Hyde shit and said “Fuck it. I’m going to go home and play me some Madden 2012.” And we all know, as an NFL coach, once you lose your players respect, you will lose your job. Just like many Americans waking up this morning, Mr. Todd Haley will be looking at the Help Wanted ads in the Kansas City Star. And he has nobody to thank but himself, a shitty attitude, and one of the worst homeless looking beards I have ever seen on a man.

So, this morning as I shake off the tequila hangover, I am a wee bit excited. Why? Because this town is abuzz with excitement. Why? Because everyone, I mean EVERYONE is convinced the next head coach of the Kansas City Chiefs will be the one and only Bill Cowher. What? We can dream can’t we?

Jack Del Rio was fired by the Jaguars on Tuesday.

Nail in the coffin: the 20-13 loss to Houston on Sunday. Also announced was the sale of the team to Illinois businessman Shahid Khan. Defensive coordinator Mel Tucker has been named as the interim head coach and will be given the opprtunity to apply for the job.

Rick Neuheisel was fired on Monday by UCLA.

Nail in the coffin: an embarrassing 50-0 ass-kicking last Saturday delivered by cross-town rivals USC. Neuheisel was fired despite the fact that the team will play in the inaugural PAC 12 championship this weekend, with Neuheisel on the sideline calling the shots. Whaaaaa????

Dennis Erickson, head coach of Arizona State University was fired Monday.

Nail in the coffin: the Sun Devil’s loss on Friday to Cal and 4 seasons with a .500 record. Erickson will also coach through his team’s final game of the season. (This shit is crazy. Hey Coach, you’re fired, but, uh, could you hang around for one more game?)

Larry Coyer, the defensive coordinator for the Colts was replaced by the linebacker coach, Mike Murphy.

Nail in the coffin: the Colts 0-11 season, duh.

So, if you’re a football coach, it looks like it might be a good year to be looking for a high profile job. I’ll throw my hat in the ring for the UCLA job. I can’t be any worse than Neuheisel.

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