Twitter Made Me Rush The Field | Draft Day Suit

Twitter Made Me Rush The Field

In what is easily the worst excuse I have heard today, an 18 year old Yankees fan named Dylan McCue-Masone a.k.a. @MansoneDylan blamed Twitter for his shenanigans when he rushed the field during the All Star game a few days ago.

I want you to understand that I am saying this a person who has also heard these two pathetic excuses today. 1) I didn’t clean my room because Ian distracted me;  and 2) I couldn’t feed the cat because I heard a buzzing sound in my room. I know a poor excuse for an excuse when I hear one, but this isn’t about my children. This is about Dylan.

Dylan told twitter that if he got 1000 retweets (RT in twitterspeak) he would run across the field.

Dylan's tweet

Let’s just use our context clues and assume he left out the apostrophe for the contraction “I will”.

As you can see, at the time this screenshot was taken he has 3,556 retweets. Not bad!

Unless you are Dylan.

Dylan is going to do it!

Wait you guys, the plot thickens. His mom doesn’t want him to do it!

Dylan's mom says no

Apparently lack of punctuation runs in the family.

His mom has a good point.  Running out onto the field during an all-star game is a terrible idea. Did you know you could go to prison for it? Did you know you could be charged with third-degree criminal trespassing?  I bet Dylan didn’t. I know for a fact he knows that now.

But Dylan was not deterred by parental warnings.

Dylan's mo m is going to kill him tweet.

Would it kill him to hit the shift key?

Then this happened.

Then this.

Dylan is sorry. So very, very sorry.

Dylan now faces a year in prison.

One time my niece told Instagram that if she got 100 likes she would cover her face in peanut butter and take a picture of it and post it. I don’t understand why anyone would do that. I mean, I liked the picture, just to be a jerk, but I don’t understand the reasoning behind asking social media to dare you to do something. Social media will dare you. Social media will double-dog dare you no take backs.

My niece got 135 likes. She still hasn’t posted the PB and face picture. I am not condoning this behavior, but at least she isn’t going to the big house.

I can’t sit here and say that all of my tweets have perfect punctuation, nor can I say that I haven’t gotten drunk and done stupid things at baseball games, but so far I haven’t done anything at a sporting event that has gotten me arrested. Probably because Twitter isn’t the boss of me. Maybe because I try to listen to my mother.

YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOUR MOTHER, DYLAN.

Photo by John Munson/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports

Photo by John Munson/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports

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About the author
Goon Squad Sarah lives in the Washington D.C. suburbs and spends a lot of time obsessing about the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the Washington Capitals, fantasy football, and explaining to her nine year old twins why we don't root for the Redskins in our house. Sarah is also a sucker for the Orlando Magic and the Washington Nationals. If you can't get enough of Sarah here you can also find her writing at Sarah and the Goon Squad, SNAFU Music, MamaPop or a myriad of other sites depending on the day. She also sits on the advisory board of Women Talk Sports. Sarah founded Draft Day Suit back in 2006.

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3 Replies to Twitter Made Me Rush The Field

  1. Erin says:

    Could you IMGINE the things I could blame on Twitter????????? Hmmmmmm

  2. Oh, I can imagine.

    (We should totally blame Twitter.)

  3. Norm says:

    I drank way too much this weekend. Twitter is totally to blame

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