Confused by the World Cup buzz? I was.
I’m not talking about the incessant yapping of the media and everyone watching and even the people who claim not to be watching who seem obsessed with talking about the World Cup anyway. I’m talking vuvuzelas, baby.
Mind you I did not know what these horns were called until yesterday. I’ve watched exactly no soccer games in my life but I’ve been watching the World Cup since the opening ceremonies started because:
a. I am currently spending a lot of time on my couch working from home.
b. I appear to be on a quest to expose myself to every single sport, even those in which I previously had zero interest. This includes timbersports, which I just learned are a thing.
c. When you hashtag #worldcup on Twitter, a little soccer ball pops up in your Tweet. I am easily amused by this sort of thing, and will be lobbying for a little Twitter puck next year during hockey playoffs for sure.
On the first day, I enjoyed watching the South African team celebrate their goal against Mexico, the first goal of the whole shebang in what would end as a 1-1 tie game.
I am seriously considering adding that little dance to my just-because daily repertoire.
So things started off enjoyably, but after a few hours, the low, droning buzz in the stadium that seemed to get louder and louder as the games wore on started to get to me.
Bzzzzz. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Long, relatively uneventful stretches of men kicking a ball around and bopping it with their heads. Bzzzzz. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
OMG CICADAS SWARMING AROUND MY HOUSE OMG STFU GET THEM OFF ME.
Then everyone on Twitter started talking about the noise, and complaining about the noise, and how it was distracting and unnerving and why was it happening? So I knew I wasn’t alone, which is nice, because it’s sad to bitch alone and validation that I’m not hearing things is always useful too.
Vuvuzelas FTW! Glasses not necessarily included.
These vuvuzela horns — find me a more fun word to say, I challenge you — are a traditional part of South African soccer games. Culturally speaking, I think that’s pretty interesting. But their noise output averages about 127 decibels — louder than a chain saw, says this former audiology major — and that’s a lot to listen to for an hour and a half straight. FIFA considered banning them for the Cup but the South African football association were understandably not down.
Here’s Mike and Mike complaining about them.
A site called Ban the Vuvuzela is up already, with the “against” camp firmly in the lead. World Cup organizer Danny Jordaan caused a bit of a stir Sunday when the BBC reported that he insinuated that the horns, which have been accused of distracting players, the audience and newscasters, may be banned. But reports quickly surfaced that that would only happen in the case of a vuvuzela being thrown on the soccer pitch or used in any kind of way to harass players or the crowd.
Meanwhile vuvuzelas are selling in England — and probably in other places, I just haven’t seen the reports — at a fast clip, and I would like one, too. I’m not going to make noise on it for 90 minutes or annoy anyone on purpose, but I just figure something called a vuvuzela would be a fun thing to have.
This World Cup business will be going on for a month so I’ll keep an eye on this critical issue. You’ve got your #vuvuzelawatch right here.
i agree!! vuvuzela must be banned from the stadiums.