Dear Grady Sizemore,

By | November 30, 2009 | Baseball | 6 Comments

This is just a professional courtesy letter to advise you that the Cleveland Indians ball club would prefer it if you kept these sort of pics to yourself and very intimate friends and did not go posting about the web.

While we appreciate your efforts to draw a crowd of ladies to admire your VERY handsome physique, we just think that we want to keep this a FAMILY show and your johnson really doesn’t have have a place out in public (or hiding behing a coffee mug either).

Oh, and work on the guns. The rest of the bod is fairly rockin’. But we think you’ll draw a better crowd if you:

  • Show them the goods 

OR

  • Give them THE GUN SHOW

Please pick one.

 

Sincerely,

Cleveland Indians Front Office

(ps click the link for more pics!)

*serious props to my plurkie pal Mikalis for hitting us with this link today. THAT Is good stuff!*

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About the author
I am a transplanted Hoosier who resides in the Atlanta metro area. I'm a die hard Colts fan and as far as I'm concerned you aren't a fan unless you suffered through Jeff George as a quarterback. I'll give you a pass if you weren't born yet, but mostly if you weren't standing beside the highway cheering the Mayflower trucks into town on the night we stole that team, well then you aren't a fan. Additionally I think that wearing a pink jersey is a brilliant way to pwn an opposing team's player. If you pick your fantasy team based on uniform color or a players "Hot Butt" - well I'm sorry you may not sit with me during games. I only speak dead languages fluently and I like to wear things that make no sense.

6 Replies to Dear Grady Sizemore,

  1. Lisse says:
    November 30, 2009 at 9:22 pm

    If you look closely, you’ll see that the mug has a, ahem, teabag in it.

  2. Gidge says:
    November 30, 2009 at 10:37 pm

    Very well shaved sack, Mr Sizemore. Very nice.

  3. GoonSquadSarah says:
    December 1, 2009 at 10:08 am

    Grady went to the doctor and said “Doctor! I think I am going crazy!” and the doctor said, “Yes Grady, I can see…”

  4. Laurie says:
    December 1, 2009 at 11:08 pm

    Sizemore? Really?

    I have trouble faulting him for this just because he looks so damned happy.

  5. ParentopiaDevra says:
    December 2, 2009 at 10:42 am

    Well, if you count the tea, he’s about three bags full.

  6. ParentopiaDevra says:
    December 3, 2009 at 8:43 am

    He also leaves his toilet seat up. So if you are a girl and visiting him, keep that in mind if you need to use the facilities at his place.

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